The Fear Beneath the Anger

“Run from what is comfortable. Forget safety. Live where you fear to live.”

Anger is often fear's public face. When we feel threatened, when our sense of safety or worth or control is challenged, the fear that arises can be too vulnerable to show. So it becomes anger instead.

The person who lashes out when criticized is often afraid of being seen as inadequate. The person who becomes controlling in relationships is often afraid of being abandoned. The person who responds to uncertainty with rage is often afraid of what the uncertainty might bring.

This does not excuse the anger. But it explains it. And understanding the fear beneath the anger is the first step toward responding to it differently.

The next time you feel anger rising, ask: what am I afraid of right now? The answer may surprise you.

Related Reflections

Themes that often travel alongside fear.